It was one of those cold, windy days in March that everyone hates. Well, almost everyone hates them. My parents were debating on where we would go for vacation. It was between Myrtle Beach and Wildwood.
"Myrtle Beach has warmer water." argued my mom.
"Sure it does. But, have you noticed that it's eight hours away, and we have a two-year old with us." Dad said.
"Matthew hates Wildwood." Mom insisted.
"Chase can't handle the ride. He's two." Dad said.
"Why don't you ask us?" I asked. gesturing toward my brothers and I.
"Rebecca, please go entertain Chase." they dismissively said.
They argued off and on for a week until my siblings and I stepped in.
"Really? You've been arguing all week. Just choose a place." Matthew irratibly demanded.
"You're making Chase antsy." I added.
"Oooooh!" Chase screamed.
Mom and Dad saw our reactions and finally chose Myrtle Beach. We had a good time, so it was all good.
Monday, February 28, 2011
Friday, February 25, 2011
My Very Humiliating Role
"You're on soon, Xavier! Get dressed!" the director yelled.
I swallowed nervously, and stared at my costume. It was so humiliating! The costume was a girlish toga thing. I was going to wear 6-inch stiletto heels. Apparently, they made me look more womanly. The wig I was given was a golden blond and really itchy.
I growled as I put on the outfit. It's not like I wanted to play a woman, but my agent promised she had the perfect role for me. Yeah, right.
My part was the leading lady. In other words I'd have to kiss some dude. The main hero was good looking, I guess. I have a wife, and this will be so embarrassing.
I took a deep breath and walked on stage. I heard cat calls and whistling from the audience. My face heated up with anger and humiliation.
A few hours later I was running away from weird guys who wanted my number. I guess that I make a good woman? Ugh.
I swallowed nervously, and stared at my costume. It was so humiliating! The costume was a girlish toga thing. I was going to wear 6-inch stiletto heels. Apparently, they made me look more womanly. The wig I was given was a golden blond and really itchy.
I growled as I put on the outfit. It's not like I wanted to play a woman, but my agent promised she had the perfect role for me. Yeah, right.
My part was the leading lady. In other words I'd have to kiss some dude. The main hero was good looking, I guess. I have a wife, and this will be so embarrassing.
I took a deep breath and walked on stage. I heard cat calls and whistling from the audience. My face heated up with anger and humiliation.
A few hours later I was running away from weird guys who wanted my number. I guess that I make a good woman? Ugh.
Wednesday, February 23, 2011
One of my Worst Memory
When I was about eight or nine I got really sick over the summer. My stomach was insanely upset, and I even had trouble going down the stairs. All in all I was in pain.
None of that is my worst memory, however. The absolute worse was that I was running for a week on two to four hours of sleep a night. I was half asleep in the daytime, and freaked out over the smallest thing. The reason I had no hope to get a full night's sleep was I had the strangest nightmares. I could never remember what they were about, and half the time I woke up somewhere other than where I fell asleep.
It may not seem that bd but you weren''t there to experience the nightmares.
None of that is my worst memory, however. The absolute worse was that I was running for a week on two to four hours of sleep a night. I was half asleep in the daytime, and freaked out over the smallest thing. The reason I had no hope to get a full night's sleep was I had the strangest nightmares. I could never remember what they were about, and half the time I woke up somewhere other than where I fell asleep.
It may not seem that bd but you weren''t there to experience the nightmares.
Wednesday, February 16, 2011
My Big Discovery
It was a very solemn day, but I wasn't sure why. My whole family looked miserable. The sky seemed to have been drained of all color. I had been forced into an itchy purple dress, and pinchy black shoes. I felt like crying.
As we stepped up on a platform, I saw my six year-old cousin laying in a coffin. My little five year-old brain couldn't comprehend it.
"Mommy?" I whispered.
"Shhhh." she said.
I pouted, and because everyone else did I went up and touched my cousin's hand. It was cold. Not the cold of snow or the cold of the freezer, but a new, entirely different cold. It was only later that I knew it was the cold of death.
Suddenly, I understood that my cousin was gone. She wasn't coming back, and I cried.
As we stepped up on a platform, I saw my six year-old cousin laying in a coffin. My little five year-old brain couldn't comprehend it.
"Mommy?" I whispered.
"Shhhh." she said.
I pouted, and because everyone else did I went up and touched my cousin's hand. It was cold. Not the cold of snow or the cold of the freezer, but a new, entirely different cold. It was only later that I knew it was the cold of death.
Suddenly, I understood that my cousin was gone. She wasn't coming back, and I cried.
Monday, February 14, 2011
A Sweeping Change
Q&A with Jubilee Pastri, Director of the Cupcake Dynasty
Q. Can you tell us about the overthrowing of the previous director?
A. Well, Cupcake Frosting, our previous director, was the one who founded Cupcake Dynasty. He was originally a wonderful leader and I was his trusted second in command. Then Mr. Frosting started to reduce the workers' paychecks. The workers went on strike and the demand for cupcakes grew until Mr. Frosting had no choice but to hand over his position to me.
Q. How do you feel about Mr. Frosting now?
A. I feel that Mr. Frosting was a wonderful man. He really was. Frosting was a true cupcake making genius. The power corrupted him.
Q. What changes are you going to make?
A. I have many ideas for the Cupcake Dynasty. Giant cupcakes, and cupcakes with pictures of real people on them are just two.
Q. Where is Mr. Frosting now?
A. I believe that he is now retired and is taking therapy to deal with his issues. I hope he'll be better soon.
Q. Can you tell us about the overthrowing of the previous director?
A. Well, Cupcake Frosting, our previous director, was the one who founded Cupcake Dynasty. He was originally a wonderful leader and I was his trusted second in command. Then Mr. Frosting started to reduce the workers' paychecks. The workers went on strike and the demand for cupcakes grew until Mr. Frosting had no choice but to hand over his position to me.
Q. How do you feel about Mr. Frosting now?
A. I feel that Mr. Frosting was a wonderful man. He really was. Frosting was a true cupcake making genius. The power corrupted him.
Q. What changes are you going to make?
A. I have many ideas for the Cupcake Dynasty. Giant cupcakes, and cupcakes with pictures of real people on them are just two.
Q. Where is Mr. Frosting now?
A. I believe that he is now retired and is taking therapy to deal with his issues. I hope he'll be better soon.
Wednesday, February 9, 2011
My Mom's Products
Here are five products my mom uses:
1. Windex Multi-Surface Cleaner
2. All purses
3. carpet cleaners
4. vaccume cleaner
5. Town and Country minivan
"REBECCA! Have you seen my teal purse?!" yelled my mom.
"Which one?!" I yelled back.
"The one that has the buckles!" she said.
I sighed, exasperatedly. My mom was obsessed with purses. She had enough to wear a different one each day for a year.
"Didn't you leave that in the hallway closet?" I asked.
"No, I moved it." Mom admitted.
She sat next to me and shrugged her shoulders in capitulation.
"You could use your other teal purse. You know? The one with the studs." I suggested.
"OH! You're right! I'll just use that." my mother said.
My mom is pretty easy to please when it comes to purses. She has so many purses it's not difficult to find one similiar to the original one she wanted.
1. Windex Multi-Surface Cleaner
2. All purses
3. carpet cleaners
4. vaccume cleaner
5. Town and Country minivan
"REBECCA! Have you seen my teal purse?!" yelled my mom.
"Which one?!" I yelled back.
"The one that has the buckles!" she said.
I sighed, exasperatedly. My mom was obsessed with purses. She had enough to wear a different one each day for a year.
"Didn't you leave that in the hallway closet?" I asked.
"No, I moved it." Mom admitted.
She sat next to me and shrugged her shoulders in capitulation.
"You could use your other teal purse. You know? The one with the studs." I suggested.
"OH! You're right! I'll just use that." my mother said.
My mom is pretty easy to please when it comes to purses. She has so many purses it's not difficult to find one similiar to the original one she wanted.
Friday, February 4, 2011
My Least Favorite Food
Note: This is false! I despise chocolate more than any other food!
Mmmmm! I love chocolate! It's the best food on Eath, you know? Chocolate is creamy, and really sweet. It's like a bite of heaven. It is warm brown, and gives me a cozy feeling. Sort of like laying down with a heated blanket.
Chocolate makes me feel good. It releases endorphins in the brain, which makes people happy. Everyone likes to be happy, right?
I really do LOVE chocolate more than anything! Everyone should try it!
Mmmmm! I love chocolate! It's the best food on Eath, you know? Chocolate is creamy, and really sweet. It's like a bite of heaven. It is warm brown, and gives me a cozy feeling. Sort of like laying down with a heated blanket.
Chocolate makes me feel good. It releases endorphins in the brain, which makes people happy. Everyone likes to be happy, right?
I really do LOVE chocolate more than anything! Everyone should try it!
Wednesday, February 2, 2011
Caveman Government
"Fugian Council! It is time to create our government!" yelled Ugen.
"Perhaps, but who is to create the laws?" Flug asked warily.
"Do not be stupid, Flug! Clearly, the Great Urgen Flurgen will create the laws. He is the wisest of all!" Allf scoffed.
Flug looked relieved and then very insulted. How dare he suggest Flug was stupid! Just as he was about to kick Allf, a lanky, thin caveman with white hair put his arm in front of him.
"Do not hurt him. There is no need. I will create your laws." the man soothed.
"Oh! The Great Urgen Flurgen is here!" the council screamed in unison.
"Be calm. These are the laws:
1. If you desire something from another give something in return.
2. Kill any man who kills a family member.
3. Cut off the hands of any children who disobey an elder."
"How genius, O Great Urgen Flurgen!" they cried.
The Great Urgen Flurgen slipped silently away into the fog. He left the cavemen to kill each other because we all know that every government needed a leader. He hadn't botherwed to appoint one.
"Perhaps, but who is to create the laws?" Flug asked warily.
"Do not be stupid, Flug! Clearly, the Great Urgen Flurgen will create the laws. He is the wisest of all!" Allf scoffed.
Flug looked relieved and then very insulted. How dare he suggest Flug was stupid! Just as he was about to kick Allf, a lanky, thin caveman with white hair put his arm in front of him.
"Do not hurt him. There is no need. I will create your laws." the man soothed.
"Oh! The Great Urgen Flurgen is here!" the council screamed in unison.
"Be calm. These are the laws:
1. If you desire something from another give something in return.
2. Kill any man who kills a family member.
3. Cut off the hands of any children who disobey an elder."
"How genius, O Great Urgen Flurgen!" they cried.
The Great Urgen Flurgen slipped silently away into the fog. He left the cavemen to kill each other because we all know that every government needed a leader. He hadn't botherwed to appoint one.
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